Dear Santa: Can You Clean Up My Inbox? A 2017 Employee Wish List
If we can't have a puppy, can we at least get an empty inbox... or a week without meetings?
What employees really want this Christmas:
MillennialsA whole day without anyone asking them what they like to eat/wear/talk about. "No, we weren't actually born with a screen in our hands. And I am not impatient. And can somebody else please fix my parents' computer?"
Gen XA whole day without reading about what Millennials like to eat/wear/talk about. "All we hear all day long is how great Millennials are at this, or how wonderful Millennials are at that. Millennials, Millennials, Millenials. And seriously... you're already talking about generation Z?? And can you please get Boomers to stop putting double spaces after periods?"
BoomersA single sentence that doesn't start with the word "Boomer" and end with "aging, retiring! or dead." "We're still here, you know. We've got one word for you: Clooney! And kids - that voice mail I left isn't going to listen to itself. And can someone please fix my computer?"
Working Moms12 months without the word "cupcakes" "three dozen" and "tomorrow morning" in the same sentence! and an elf that gets off the blasted shelf makes lunch. "It's a sandwich!...and no, I didn't see the Bento lunch box Catie's mom bought on Etsy." Oh... and a good night's sleep.
Working DadsAn end to the term "assembly required." "And don't even try to fool me with that 'Minimal assembly required.' Just sell it to me put together, OK?!" Did we mention a good night's sleep?
Parents of school-age childrenAn entire year during which recitals, teacher meetings, and special events scheduled after work hours. A vegetable that tastes like chicken fingers. "And dioramas... no more dioramas!" Oh - and sleep.
Parents of teenagersA cure for eye-rolling, a refrigerator that restocks itself, and a door that doesn't slam. "My car is where?! OMG there's a party going on at my house... I have to leave!" And... a good night's sleep.
Employers EverywhereRecruitment, retention, engagement, productivity... no skills gaps... and a good night's sleep.
On a genuine note, our wish is for a happy, safe season for all... and a little peace on earth.
Happy holidays to all... and to all a good night's sleep.
September 15, 2017